...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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