ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
