Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
