And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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