Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.