I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
