there was a trapeze. enough said
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
