I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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