Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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