Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
