they need to just BURY HIM!
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize