So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
