Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
