This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
