Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
