how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
