new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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