He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I have surprise drugs for everyone
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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