He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
