we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
