what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
