She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
