Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
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