before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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