ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
3 2 1 whiskey
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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