how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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