Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize
