Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
tell me about the eggs
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