I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
wow bdsm is so cute
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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