Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
