know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
