doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
