you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
