We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
