then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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