Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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