More tranny stories later!
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize