Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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