you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
