maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
