4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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