It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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