OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize