He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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