There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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