I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
