Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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