"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
