omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
We just shotgunned beers for America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
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