So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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